When to Seek Further Help When Grieving

Grief is one of life’s most personal experiences. No two people go through it in quite the same way and there is no stopwatch to measure how long it “should” take. Losing someone you love, whether it’s expected or sudden, can shake the foundations of your world. It’s normal to feel sadness, confusion, anger or even numbness. But sometimes, grief can become so heavy that it starts to interfere with your daily life. That’s when it might be time to seek a little extra help.

This article explores how to recognise when grief might be becoming too much to carry on your own, and where you can turn for support.

Understanding the Natural Process of Grief

When you have attended a funeral, you often hear words of comfort about how grief is “a journey.” And that’s true. Grief comes in waves. Some days you might feel okay; other days it hits you out of nowhere.

Normal grief can involve:

• Intense sadness, tears or mood swings

• Physical symptoms such as tiredness, loss of appetite or trouble sleeping

• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions

• Feeling detached or “numb” for periods of time

These are all normal responses. They’re the mind and body’s way of processing loss. Often, with time, people begin to find moments of light again.

When Grief Might Need More Support

While grief is natural, sometimes it becomes prolonged or overwhelming in a way that feels impossible to manage alone. This may happen if the loss was particularly traumatic, if you don’t have much support or if other stresses pile up at the same time.

It might be time to seek help if you notice any of the following:

• Grief feels as raw as the day of the funeral, even after many months.
  Everyone heals differently but if your feelings of sadness or hopelessness don’t ease at all, it could be a sign of complicated grief.

• You struggle to function day-to-day.
  If getting out of bed, going to work, or looking after yourself feels impossible for weeks or months on end, extra support can help you rebuild routine and purpose.

• You feel disconnected from everyone.
  Avoiding loved ones or pushing away people who care about you can deepen the isolation that often accompanies grief.

• You rely heavily on alcohol or substances.
  Some people turn to coping mechanisms to numb pain, but this can make recovery much harder.

• You have persistent thoughts of not wanting to live.
  If grief has led to thoughts of suicide or self-harm, please seek immediate help by contacting Lifeline (13 11 14) or visiting your nearest emergency department. You do not have to face this alone.

Recognising these signs isn’t weakness, it’s awareness. It means you are paying attention to your emotional wellbeing, which is an important part of healing.

The Role of Support Networks

One of the many things that can make grief feel a little lighter is connection.
Spending time with people who love you, sharing stories, memories, laughter and tears, can play a powerful role in helping you move through grief.

Family and friends don’t take the pain away, but they gently hold us as we find our footing again. Being together reminds us that love continues, even in loss and that we don’t have to navigate this tender time alone.

Sometimes, a conversation with someone who understands loss professionally, such as a grief counsellor, can help you make sense of what you’re feeling in ways that family or friends can’t.

Professional Help: When Talking to a Specialist Can Make a Difference

Seeking professional help doesn’t mean your grief is “bad” or that you’re not coping. It simply means you’re giving yourself permission to heal in a healthy way.

Therapists and counsellors who specialise in grief can:

• Help you navigate painful emotions in a safe environment

• Offer coping tools for anxiety, depression or guilt

• Support you in finding new meaning and routine after loss

Australia has many experienced grief counsellors, psychologists and social workers who can help. You can ask your GP for a referral to access Medicare-supported sessions.

Healing Takes Time, but You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

Grief doesn’t have a finish line. You don’t “get over” someone you love; you learn to live alongside their memory. But if you’ve been grieving for a long time and feel stuck, numb, or hopeless, seeking professional help can open a path to feeling lighter again.

If you’re wondering whether you need help, that thought alone is reason enough to reach out. Talking is healing. And no matter where you are in your journey, you deserve the time, space and support to find peace again.